The Practical Way To Hook A Girl For LIFE! (+Text Game Examples)


What’s up!

Welcome to the now seemingly consistent sleepless nights of Sao Paulo, Brazil…

I thought that I’d take advantage of some the free time that I have here to share with you and expand on one of the brand new perspectives that I’ve recently had on my own game as well as explore into further depth one of the more recent articles that I wrote, entitled:



As we all already know by now, women crave DRAMA…

It’s my own personal belief that women probably crave this more than anything else in the world!

It’s literally like a DRUG to them and they will do just about anything in order to get their next hit of it.

And when I say anything, I mean ANYTHING!

I took the time to explain all of the principal mechanics that are at work behind all of this in the article that I previously here above, but one of the most recurring questions that really stood out and that a lot people have been asking me since then has been along the lines of:

“Julien, I understand what you are advocating here but what are some of the practical ways that I can apply this new concept for myself?”


“Are there any guidelines that I can follow to proactively infuse women with DRAMA?”

And what I’m excited to finally be able to say to you here today, is that the answer is “YES!” to all of the above! ;]


Before we plunge into the deeper aspects of this concept, I would like to start off by saying that one of the most important things to remember all throughout this article and especially if you’re planning on applying this for yourself is that this is a ROLE-PLAY.

It’s nothing more than a role-play!

This is by no means the basis of your own game, and nor should it be.

It’s simply a role-play that you let the women that you’re interacting with bask into without any repercussions, at all…

It’s similar to how one would set a certain frame back in the day where they would accuse the women that they were interacting with of making them attracted to them, for example.

“Why are you doing this to me?”

“Why do I like you so much, stop whatever you’re doing to me!”


What I’m advocating here is taking all of this to a whole other level that is deeply ingrained into the female psyche and reaching a whole other level of attraction that was previously inconceivable to you.

So, let’s get started:

The general frame of mind that you should always be coming from when applying all of this and the main reason that it all works so well in the first place, is that you’re a self-actualized and naturally attractive man who has implemented all of the core fundamentals of game BUT you also have a vulnerable side to your personality that only she can bring out of you. 

No-one else can!

It’s the female fantasy of TAMING THE WILD STALLION and making him her own…

It’s the female fantasy of “domesticating” you from your previous ways that made you so attractive to her in the first place…

And this is the type of frame that you can start setting from the very start of the interaction and then easing her into it or that you can use all throughout a more long-Tterm type of relationship as well, if you chose to.

All of this really comes down to being a self-actualized and naturally attractive man and then showing her that EMOTIONAL VULNERABILITY.

It really comes down to letting her experience the feeling of bringing that more vulnerable side out of you and affecting you in a special way that no other woman previously ever could have.

So, what are some of the practical ways of doing this?

I would say that the most practical ways of setting all of this is by establishing the classic  “I love you” / “I hate you” PUSH-PULL type of frame. 

Playing the whole interaction in a very “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” type of way.

On one side of the coin you’re a self-actualized man who’s on his own path and who’s following his purpose in life.

But on the other side you’re letting her break through your rough exterior by bringing out the true feelings that you have for her to the surface and ultimately distracting you from your own path and your purpose.

This is a concept that David Deida originally talks about in his book “The Way of The Superior Man” where he advocates that women will unconsciously try to distract you from your own path and your purpose in life, similar to the sirens in “The Odyssey”, and that they will gain in attraction for you every time that you don’t stray away from it.

And this is something that can proactively hint at all throughout the interactions that you’re having by giving her that opportunity that she’s always wanted but without ever falling off of your own path and your purpose as a man.

It could be as basic and as a simple “I love you” / “I hate you” or as dense as “I’ve never felt this with anyone before and I really want to open myself up to you right now” / “No, I can’t and I’m afraid of being emotionally hurt if I do.”

Start experimenting around with this frame.

Try it out!

Another way of amplifying this kind of attraction is by framing her as being the ONLY person who understands you and who you can go to in times of need.

This is something that feeds deep into her fantasy of finding a man that ONLY she can emotionally move and really connect with on an emotional level.

And this also something that takes care of a lot of the “qualification” aspect of the interactions that you’re having.

Who doesn’t want to find their soul mate?

One of the main ways that you can constantly and proactively do this by creating what I like to call “conspiracy theories” between yourself and the women that you’re interacting with in general.

Reinforcing the fact that you both share a little secret that no-one else know about.

One of the main frames that you want to establish in the interactions that you’re having is the whole “you and her” bubble, where ultimately nothing else that is external to that matters, at all.

“It’s weird because even though we know nothing about each other, I really like you.  And I’ve never actually told this to anyone before because it’s kind of personal but…”

“Me and you” VS. “The world”

Another great way to generate drama all throughout the interactions that you’re having and amplifying the points that we’ve already established here above is by:


And these tantrums or emotional fits can pretty much be about anything!

They don’t have to make any sense at all, for example:

YOU: I’m sad.

HER: Why?

YOU: No, nevermind it’s fine.

HER: No tell me! What’s wrong?

YOU: Why are you always like this?

HER: Like what??? What did I do?

YOU: I don’t know, it’s weird.

HER: Did I do something to upset you?

YOU: No, I’m sorry. Nevermind what I said before, I was just tired… I love you.

HER: I love you too!

Throwing any kind of random emotional fit and then giving her the opportunity to bask in the new emotions that you’re providing her and then concluding it by giving her the opportunity to feel as if she was able to make everything better for you again and ultimately fix you.

This is something that taps very deeply into the female psyche of being the NURTURING type.

It’s one of the most primal needs of every woman to want to be with a man whom she can take of and nurture.

In a way, it’s her own way of excreting power.

Picture back in the day, a brave warrior who’s wounded from the battlefield and who’s coming back to his woman to take care of him and nurture him…

It’s the ultimate female fantasy and desire!

Now, make no mistake:

She wants to nurture the WARRIOR.

She want to take care of and soothe a self-actualized naturally attractive man who’s on his own path and who’s following his purpose in life.

Not some inept and emotionally needy man who is coming from a “value taking” type of frame.

Try viewing it more in terms of letting her help fuel your own drive as a man who’s on his own path and who has all of the core fundamentals of game already handled for himself.

And this something that also shows a certain amount of vulnerability on your part by letting your emotions get the best of you and not being able to emotionally control yourself when you’re around her.

She makes you lose all of your rational senses, which is ultimately a sign of weakness as a man.

This will reinforce the fact that she is unique to you and that she has a certain power over you that no-one else has, which also taps deep into her female psyche.


Framing the interaction in a way that gives her the opportunity to feel as if she’s your anchor in the newfound emotions that you’re experiencing and that are unknown to you.

Give her the opportunity to feel as if she’s the one who’s ultimately guiding you and providing you with all of these new emotions that you’re not yet accustomed to and that confuse you.

Some of the different ways that you could do this for example, could be by saying things along the lines of:

“I hate that I’m feeling this way for you, it’s weird.”

“I hate that I like you so much, I’ve never feel this way before for anyone else… I’m usually kind of an asshole, actually.”

“I’ve never taken a girl on a date before, really. I know that this sounds stupid but it’s actually new to me and I want to be nice and romantic with you. I really like you.”

These are some of the most effective types of frames that you could ever set when interacting with women in general and that they actually DREAM about hearing a man say!

It doesn’t get any better than this.


Stumbling and acting as if you’re overwhelmed by the emotions that she’s making you experience for the first time.

This is something that counteracts with the hard exterior that a man ultimately tries to portray for himself and frames the interaction in a way where you’re opening up and letting her in by ultimately trusting her with your weaknesses.

Trusting her with every part of who you are.


Ultimately, what I’m sure that you’ve already noticed by now is that all of this is something that tends goes against what is most traditionally recommended in this community: “Being the Lover, NOT the Provider.”

Framing yourself as the “fun and loving” guy who she will more likely feel comfortable going home with and sleep with.

And I highly recommend this as well!

However, as I mentioned in the very beginning of this article, this isn’t the basis of your game.

This is something that you can sprinkle into it as long as you enjoy this type of interaction and as long as you’re doing it in a way that isn’t attached to a certain outcome.

It’s ultimately a form of expression.

And being able to frame yourself as the “Provider” and not the “Lover” while at the same time being able to accelerate the “Love Process” by already having all of the core fundamentals of game handled is ultimately a great way to encompass all of this.

Expecting more from her than just sex or even a regular relationship!

And as a last practical way to accomplish all of this, start regularly using “future projections” all throughout the interactions that you’re having.

Accelerating the pair bond effect that two individuals tend to develop when spending a significant amount of time together by telling her that you’re going to take her somewhere on vacation where it’s just going to be the two of you, for example.

Or telling her that you want her to meet your family or that you want to meet her family in order to reinforce that same type of bond as well.

It ultimately comes down to solidifying that it’s just the two of you by using certain “future projections” in order to reinforce that bubble that you’ve now created.

Consolidating that you’re taking the interaction more seriously with her than with anyone else!

Lastly, one of the most important skillsets that you’re ultimately going to have to cultivate for yourself in order to be able to successfully incorporate everything that I’ve mentioned here above:


I just wrote an article about this a few days ago that I highly recommend that you take the time to check out if you haven’t already, entitled:


Whenever you’re going to set these types of frames it’s important that you try to develop a certain feel for the different types of emotion are going on in order to get a feel for what would make sense and when it would make sense.

You’re going to have to develop some sort of feel for how long to last on which emotion before caving in and giving her the next one.

You’re going to have to develop some sort of feel for when it would make sense to switch things up and not cause an emotional spike that is too high and that you can’t come back from.

There is of course a certain curricular motion to all of the emotional patterns that I advocate in this article, where after a while it just tends becomes the same thing over and over again where you just take it to higher heights and lowers lows.

But ultimately you’re going to have to develop a sense of what MAKES SENSE in the interactions that you’re having.

You’re going to have to develop the skillset of being able rapidly sculpting the vibe of the interaction in a way that quickly switches between different ranges of emotion and that lets her experience stronger and broader ranges than she ever experienced before with anyone else.

This is a skill that mainly cultivated over time through cold approach but you can also try to accelerate the learning process by focusing on getting yourself more in touch with your own emotions!

Once you’ve developed the more emotional side of you personality, you’ll be more attuned to what she’s thinking and feeling at any moment in time and you’ll be able to hit her with the right emotions at the right time.

Become emotional in order to relate to her emotions!

By cultivating this skillset you’re also going to become more familiar with the female psyche and what triggers it in specific ways.

Ask yourself:

“What are some of the basic socially conditioned ways that dramatic movies are structured that make women respond to them the way that they do?”

“Which parts trigger which emotions and when?”

On that note, I thought that I would conclude this article with one of my very own “Text Message” excerpts to really help illustrate everything that you’ve just read and really give you some kind of concrete example of how far you can actually take all of this if you do it the right way and if you come from the right frame of mind.


This is a text exchange that I had a while back with a Playboy model that I probably saw a total amount of three times over the course of a couple of weeks.

That’s it!

And this text exchange probably happened about two months after that, which should again really help illustrate to which degree women CRAVE drama!


The very first text that you’re about to read here was sent during some of the time that I spent in Miami South Beach on one nights that I failed to pull a girl back to my hotel…

Now again, as a side note, I do NOT recommend taking any of this to such an extent but take this more as an example to really help hammer in these different concepts as well as give you a sense of what “sculpting the vibe of the interaction” looks like:

ME: I just got fucked over by a girl :(

HER: Huh?

HER: :/

ME: I know im sad

HER: I’m so confused lol

ME: I thought this girl loved me but killed me emotionally

ME: Never opening myself up again emotionally :(

HER: Okay… You asked me to be your gf, then you screwed around and played games on me, so I guess you know how it feels to be played with

HER: Doesn’t feel good does it?

ME: I don’t feel like you were ready

HER: Well, you were wrong

ME: :(

HER: You picked trash over a classy/nice girl like me…

HER: Boo

ME: I still love you

HER: Clearly, that’s why you were with someone else when you were supposed to be my bf…

ME: I didn’t do anything actually so heartbroken

And this next text exchange happened a few days later with this same girl, after adding another girl who had been flaking on me as my girlfriend on Facebook… ;]

HER: I am so upset with you :(

HER: You have hurt me so bad, I can’t trust you, for sure, I don’t know why I even tried, cause clearly you just wanted to play around on me the whole time, you call me and tell me that you want to see me and ask me not to hang up on you and your dating this girl at the same time??? You just threw away someone who really cared for you genuinely and now all you have is nothing left…I’m glad I told her what was going on, she deserves to know, no one deserves to be treated like that, I opened up myself to you, trusting you when everyone kept warning me about you…And I mean everyone…I ignored it, because I thought you were a good decent person…

ME: You do realize I’m not dating that girl right? This is kind of creepy, also even if I was we haven’t seen eachother in forever. I actually did want to see you as again I’m not with anyone else but there’s too much negativity sorry

HER: Negativity….Well what the hell am I supposed to think when I see something like “In a relationship” and her posting “Where are you Romeo?” On your wall?

ME: You could have asked me? It woulnd’t be that corny if it was true either :) sad you blew this up and ruined things between us

ME: I actually never seen anyone react like this

HER: So it is true or not? :/ You’re creeped out? I’m telling you how this situation looks like and is making me feel, I’m being honest with you…You’ve probably never had anyone you dated with strong moral value who really cared about you either that’s why you’ve never had anyone act like this…

ME: It’s not true. You don’t even trust me when I’ve already told you so many times, I don’t see why you’re upset if you can’t even trust me

HER: If it’s not true then take it off your facebook

ME: … Goodbye jessica

HER: Glad I caught you in a lie Julien, cause if it really wasn’t true then you would remove it…and it is goodbye…So sad because I really did care for you and like you very much :(

HER: So sad to think of what we could have shared together :( </3

ME: The only reason I’m saying goodbye is cause you don’t trust me and you’re too negative. I didn’t lie. Believe what you like, either way it doesn’t really change anything at this point

HER: Any person would be negative in this situation, I’m so upset, I did trust you, if you want me to trust you then you should do something to show that I can trust you, trust is something that is earned through actions, not something that is freely given to someone…I’m a perfectly logical and sound human being, I don’t hate you, I’m just telling you how this whole situation is making me feel, but you prob just think I’m some “crazy bitch” now, cause you’re not used to total honesty, I do care for you very much honsetly, I think that this is why I was so upset when I found out, cause normally I would just think to myself “fuck it” and move on easily, but instead I got genuinely upset and I’m not used to feeling that, so perhaps I came off a bit too forward in speaking with you…And I have missed you

HER: That girl just facebooked me, she told me that it was all a joke and that she had only met you once in a bar and she was sorry cause she knows how that could feel and that I don’t have to be worried about anything….I mean, put yourself in my shoes, after seeing that, wouldn’t that piss you off and make you think you couldn’t trust me? So, I’M SORRY BABY Xo

HER: I hope you can forgive me and we go out soon, sorry for the misunderstanding, I just hope you could understand how it looked to me hunny…Well, let me know either way <3

ME: Thanks for apologizing, goodbye jessica.

HER: :’( </3…I actually am really crying, kind of embarrassing I’m at a shoot, had to excuse myself in the bathroom :( …I don’t even know why I’m telling you this, but I really do care for you and I know that is why I got so pisse doff when I thought you were in a relationship with that other girl cause I felt betrayed :( …I’m so upset baby and I miss you :’( I’m sorry, I don’t want to not see you anymore….I’m really not a negative person at all, I just got really upset and that is not like me at all and I know it’s cause I do genuinely care you a lot

ME: Jessica you don’t even know me, how can say all this when we’ve only seen eachother a few times? Even if I were seeing someone else how could you feel betrayed? I did really like you to though, its weird :(

HER: I don’t get it, your always telling me how much you love me and miss me and want to see me and how your not seeing anybody else and now you turn it around on me and ask me how I could be upset? :/…. It is weird…:/ I do really like you too x…I do want to see you again

ME: You could have been upset and asked me instead of continuously calling me a liar and even messaging the girl. Actually nevermind, I hope everyhting works out for you -Julien

HER: I’m sorry hunny, can we please just get past this? I know I could have asked you, but it looked super bad Julien, you must know how bad it looked, I’m sorry I called you a liar baby…I’m sorry I didn’t handle the situation in a different way, but I wasn’t really in the clearest mindset at that exact moment…I’m sorry, can we please just get coffee and talk tomorrow or something? Xx…I’m working till 1am tonight and all I can think about is you and how I feel so bad for calling you a liar and all of this misunderstanding, but that is exactly what it is is a misunderstanding and I am only human, everyone makes mistakes every once in a while and I care for you so much <3

ME: Why do you like me so much?

HER: Because you’re very sweet, handsome, smart, funny, when you hold my hand it feels right, I like the way you look at me, and you pursue your dreams :) …Why do you like me?

Seduction, in all of it’s forms…


  1. David L June 28, 2012 at 2:14 am - Reply

    Loved the breakdown of showing different emotions! Vampire Diaries FTW!

    • Julien June 28, 2012 at 2:21 am - Reply


      Thanks man!

    • Anthony July 8, 2013 at 8:12 pm - Reply

      Julien, you’re actually a fucking genius. You took my game to the next level.

  2. Justin June 28, 2012 at 3:11 am - Reply

    Nice one juju!

  3. Tubs June 28, 2012 at 4:00 am - Reply

    I’m a bit confused, this sounds the gaming at RSD is going full circle right back to weirdo manipulative scarcity gaming?

    Also how come you try so hard to fuck other guys girl friends? I don’t get it dude, is this really the way of the superior man, is this really the path of self actualization?

    Am I missing something or are you a sex addicted weirdo? ;-)

    • jack July 5, 2012 at 3:09 pm - Reply

      I 100% agree with tubs, exactly what I was thinking. I really like most of your stuff man, the whole non apologetic do what you want attitude was a huge turning point for me when I saw you explain it. and i understand “change your perception of reality”. but this is lame. this is creepy. this is not something i could sit down with the boys at the end of the week and laugh about. not only is it not enjoyable, maybe your different to me, but if a girl sent me a text that long, i would put my phone away. but its not “congruent” with a “self actualised man”. its congruent with a desperate faggot. whether you believe if she really enjoys it or not, the fact is. Your lying and stringing her along. Why would you need to do this? if you are congruent with the person you put across when you pull her. you shouldn’t need to do this because she’d want to hang with you regardless. “because your a top bloke”. I guess the goal to new gaming is not just to pull the most girls but to be the greatest all rounded person, to love your self and make other feel good and in return you get the girls, the friends and the life. To teach drama as a frame of normality, is just back tracking. It’s safe to say James bond would never do this. i know there’s defiantly a point to take from the article, and the push pull drama aspect makes sense. but playing mind games is not progressive. you can’t have drama between two people and expect it to stay on one end. it’s building up negativity around you, and it might work with a playboy model, but any other girl is just going to piss you off with nagging. especially if you have to see them. DRAMA IS EXACTLY THE REASON I BROKE UP WITH MY GIRLFRIEND. i do not! want it being brought into my single life. different people different strokes i guess. but in my opinion, i don’t think you should offer this as a frame to forward a new generation of guys. it’s not cool.

  4. Qkish June 28, 2012 at 4:12 am - Reply


    Now I know on what to focus on soap drama movies)

  5. Jarkko Helenius June 28, 2012 at 6:41 am - Reply

    As long as this style comes from a place of congruence, I don’t see any problem with it. I’ve actually done it perfectly naturally with my girlfriend. But I can see this totally used as a manipulation.

    • Tubs June 28, 2012 at 10:15 am - Reply

      Lol, not sure I want to be congruent with drama?

  6. Sick-Cunt June 28, 2012 at 9:42 am - Reply

    Fucking epic! Lmao. I want to really get this down, not as a new default style of game but for once in a while when you need some funny self amusement and want to see just how far you can push it.

  7. Dylan June 28, 2012 at 11:50 am - Reply

    AWESOME POST JULIEN! I liked all the breakdown with examples and different situations.

    To those who dislike this kind of game: Go read/watch Julien’s original post on creating massive amounts of drama. He admits it is a “grey area” of pickup. If you don’t like it, feel free not to use it!

    Personally, this kind of game jives with my philosophy. Life is short. Everyone lives once. You are giving girls something that they would never experience otherwise. And to them, it’s GOOD!

  8. Busking for Pussy June 28, 2012 at 12:06 pm - Reply

    lol, this was so sick. I couldnt help but say “what a douche” out loud a couple of times.

  9. Richard June 28, 2012 at 12:25 pm - Reply

    Julien, do you ask all the girls to be your girlfriend?

    Like do all the girls get it in their mind that they are with you after you see them a couple times – like in their mind they think its a relationship style vs just a fuck buddy style

    • Jabyyyyy July 3, 2012 at 1:33 pm - Reply

      Yeah, could you please Five an insight here please

      • Jabyyyyy July 3, 2012 at 1:34 pm - Reply

        Give instead of Five

  10. Richard June 28, 2012 at 12:38 pm - Reply

    And can you make an article as to how you you got started as an rsd instructor – I know you spent 2 years with tyler, but how did that come to be?

  11. Jesse June 28, 2012 at 3:34 pm - Reply

    Dude, this article is too sick! Back when I was in high school, I actually did this ‘opening up emotionally to only one girl’ to a couple chicks I knew. They were all friends, but holy shit did they get sucked into the drug. All of them would text, want to hang out and party with me. Never thought I could do the same thing with chicks I actually wanted. Can’t wait to try this out.

    Text message was absolutely hilarious hahaha

  12. Ryan June 28, 2012 at 5:37 pm - Reply

    This is the best thing ive ever read in my life.

    I think the hardest thing for a man to do is open up emotionally to a woman.
    As you have demonstrated though once you master this aspect the girl will be hooked.


  13. derp June 28, 2012 at 7:01 pm - Reply

    lol this guy is frauding hard. let me tell you a story of a true player. i was fingering this girl, and she said put two fingers in. i did, then she said put your whole hand in. i did that too, and she says put both hands in. i slide my other hand in and she says now clap your hands. i try but i cant. she smiled and said thats right, tight arent i?

  14. Luke June 28, 2012 at 8:12 pm - Reply

    ” … goodbye jessica” xD hahahaha the texts are absolutely hilarious! made it super clear on how to play with the drama to draw her in. awesum stuff, julien.
    guys who reckon this is shocking and cruel, the stuff he is saying is so ridiculous and over the top there is NO WAY it can be taken seriously by the girl.
    it’s the same as watching a film like titanic or something – even if it makes her cry, she’s not going to regret watching it cos overall it was fun and stimulating

  15. Sick-Cunt June 28, 2012 at 9:19 pm - Reply

    Question for Julien:

    Would this sort of thing work on a girl that is not already really interested in you? Like if she is just barely hooked.

    • Julien July 1, 2012 at 8:51 pm - Reply

      Yeah, I tend to do it from the very start of every interaction.

      However I would recommend doing it in a slightly more playful way in the very beginning and then slowly easing her into it as the interaction progresses…

  16. crakuhjack June 29, 2012 at 12:31 pm - Reply


  17. Michael June 30, 2012 at 4:46 pm - Reply

    Hey Julien…

    What the fuck…..Man come on… know that drama doesn’t work all the time. That’s insane. I believe that playboy model slept with you, and its interesting she KNOWS you guys only saw each other 3 days, and yet shes doing all this…I just feel like you honestly MAY have manipulated this girl into ACTUALLY thinking you two were an item. Have you ever considered she is a type of girl that maybe is like this and think you ACTUALLY meant what you said half the time? The thing is…the drama and self actualization makes sense…but you have to answer me here: you cant say she 100% knows you’re not being serious….sounds very much like she thinks you are and is equally being just as serious with you. :/

    Whats your take on this ?

  18. Arno July 1, 2012 at 2:04 pm - Reply


  19. DC July 1, 2012 at 4:42 pm - Reply


    Hey Julien,

    As a hobbyist of the game I find your stuff extremely practical and intuitive.

    I’d like to hear more about your views on RAS and “Getting her RAS on you” and how you pull her RAS on you and keep it/lead it on you (RAS subtleties at the open, while in set and while persisting/handling objections)

    I attended your hotseat with you leading it and learned tons from it and I’m considering taking a bootcamp with you in the future and would like to hear what you have to say on the topic of RAS in a more deep and detailed level cause that’s an area I was really blown away at the way you handled it and the level of mastery you had over it.


    • Julien July 1, 2012 at 7:55 pm - Reply

      Thanks, man.

      You’ve actually read my mind with this particular topic (or as I like to call it: “conducting an RAS surgery”) I’ll get on it ASAP!

  20. guido789 July 1, 2012 at 9:47 pm - Reply

    I love David Deida. I like the
    I like the idea of actively conveying your vulnerable side but without ever falling off of your own path and your purpose as a man e.g:

    “I’ve never felt this with anyone before and I really want to open myself up to you right now” / “No, I can’t and I’m afraid of being emotionally hurt if I do.”

    This shows that nothing will stop you from your mission and subsequently they will gain in attraction for you every time that you don’t stray away from it.

    However, I don’t like the idea of ‘letting her win’ (regardless of ‘roleplay’) by not not being able to emotionally control yourself when you’re around her which demonstates that she has a certain power over you. As David Deida notes in this analogy:

    “Every time she sucks you into an uncontrollable need to ejaculate,
    she has conquered you. She controls you and masters you… And, deep down, she knows the world can do the same to you… And as long as she knows she’s in charge, she won’t trust you enough to relax fully in the force of your loving. She will always keep her heart somewhat protected.”

    Interesting stuff to think about. I’d like to hear your thoughts about this, Julien.

  21. Paris Boum Boum July 2, 2012 at 3:33 am - Reply

    “Thanks for apologizing, goodbye jessica.” lol.

    Great article, great example. You had a good idea of putting that text excerpt.

    Blog looks good now too, keep it up.

  22. Al July 2, 2012 at 8:07 pm - Reply


  23. Michael July 3, 2012 at 2:50 am - Reply

    Can you discuss “heart to heart” /empathy in a new article???? You mentioned it in Hotseat 2 apparently.

  24. GunsnRosesfan July 3, 2012 at 6:10 am - Reply

    Man, what happens when you try and move on from these chicks? If you get fed up of seeing her or whatever? Isn’t there some sort of impending emotional shitstorm if you stop seeing em?

  25. SirKonstantine July 3, 2012 at 1:12 pm - Reply

    Great post… just wished there was pics of that playboy chick.

  26. ApimpNamedSlickback July 3, 2012 at 1:23 pm - Reply

    To all the people that think Julien is “manipulating” this girl… holy shit, come on man. You guys have to realize that every girl need some form of drama to keep them interested and not bored out of their mind. Think about how much sex a hot girl can have… she can literally walk up to a dude in the street and be like do you wanna fuck me, and she’ll get sex that easily. Girls wanna chase too and its really refreshing for a guy to disagree with her or express wat he doesnt like about what shes doing. It might seem like Julien is a bit over the top but usually hot ass girls are crazy and need a shit load of drama or it might be that thyre so used to guys being like “hey omg let me be youre bitch, ill do and say whatever you want!” that a guy who isnt a positive little bitch all the time really interests her. That being said, some girls dont need that much drama and simply disagreeing with her in a conversation and playfully saying something like “you’re favorite color is red? fuck you! I hate the color red” will suffice. And if you still think Juliens story sounds minipulative, just realize that theres guys out there who buy girls cars, cloths, ect, and have never even fuked the girl yet. All im saying is dont be a little BITCH!

    • TKZ July 7, 2012 at 10:57 am - Reply

      This comment makes the most sense. There is certain girls you can do this with and certain girls you can’t, either way don’t be a afraid to try it. The only way id say not to do it is if the girls already an emotional wreck, thats far beyond control. Other than that any girl will understand or immediately get over it. Making assumptions though still have yet to try it in the positively framed mindset.

      Sometimes i could tell a story about a crappy part in my life put im afraid i might go down into that headspace. Julien, any suggestions for how actually create emotion in the interactions and not be attached to them? What kind of frame should i be coming from in this case?

  27. cashmoneyanus July 3, 2012 at 8:46 pm - Reply

    fkn beaut! enough has been said

  28. adonis July 4, 2012 at 8:34 pm - Reply

    niceee stuff!!!! What are your thoughts of using this drama to spark a previous flame that was attracted at one point in the past but fizzled? I feel like the frame of ” I dont know what it is about you but I just cant be myself around you, its weird” would work quite well. can you give some suggestions?

  29. ApimpNamedSlickback July 6, 2012 at 6:07 pm - Reply

    I think thats an awsome opinion! Whatever works for you is all that matters buddy :)

  30. Alfie July 20, 2012 at 3:50 pm - Reply

    I didn’t read the entire article, all I read was the last text message thing, It had me giggling like a little girl…..Its practically the same style as me :p

  31. LAros August 5, 2012 at 6:33 pm - Reply

    Showing your vulnerable self to create drama and ultimately trigger that womanly nurturing instinct … I had a bloke, he was bar-tending in a latin lounge, a pretty average guy, but “chill and authentic” with a certain excess nervousness about him which could have passed as fieriness as the usual latin cliche would have it. One wild night, he hooked an italian stunner (and rich heiress) from the bar, after which he just got drunk big time over the course of the night till he was dead trashed, puking and all … you should have seen the fuss the girl was making at closing time, like having the dude to lay on a bank all shivering in a blanket and asking everyone around for a drive home (for both of them at her place) like it were a federal case. They’ve been an item ever since, with her ever slavishly devoted to him. They got married to his lifelong benefit and procreated. He never stopped cheating on her and still does on a regular basis, consistently using the getting trashed device. She loves him all the more for that.

  32. David August 8, 2012 at 11:19 am - Reply

    This article is gold… Everytime i read this text message I’m amazed :)
    It’s really interesting to explore how women crave for these range of emotions…because it’s so important!
    I don’t like badboy attitudes at all, i’m much more into being a naturally attractive, high value man. It’s suits best my personality, and i think it’s more healthy in the long run. However i learn how to use these as fun roleplays in order to spark these emotions, as you well mentioned it in the beginning.

    A recent teen movie portrayed a little badboy creating, right on the spot, all sorts of drama to hook a sweet girl… it’s called “Keith” from T.Kessler. I found it funny how it explores exactly the same topic.

  33. jontheroman August 9, 2012 at 2:52 pm - Reply

    fucking legit man. i consider drama to be the biggest conduit of value to a girl… that’s what they’ve been waiting for their whole damn lives… :) it works. hah.

  34. Wilson August 16, 2012 at 3:23 pm - Reply

    Could you resume all this topic ?

  35. jeff December 9, 2012 at 1:53 am - Reply

    you know, the first time i watched this video a couple months back i thought “what a douche!” but after i read “the way of the superior man” i think “this is fucking awesome”. for those of you who think this is wrong and manipulative, i suggest you read that book! it brings a whole new level of understanding female psyche.

  36. Big BatMan December 15, 2012 at 11:14 pm - Reply

    i read julien’s text conversation every morning and laugh until it hurts

    gets the day going off right

  37. CK December 21, 2012 at 7:57 am - Reply

    This is my new absolute ideal. This is beyond pickup. This is the farthest you can possibly go. Julien is a god.

  38. the dude December 31, 2012 at 3:03 pm - Reply

    god!…just god!

  39. k-scope January 16, 2013 at 4:24 am - Reply

    Okay, this is good…some people question its integrity..but I know girls, and they do exactly the same.

    My question is…what MINDSET do you need to get in to make this work naturally? I am struggling with it, and trying to work out ‘what to say next’…I don’t want to copy and paste text, or feel like I”m scripting….so what mental shifts are necessary to start doing this sort of texting from a natural, spontaneous place?


  40. Yani March 4, 2013 at 4:39 pm - Reply

    Thanks so much for being honest and sharing (many know these secrets and dont share so thanks) but dont you feel for these girls.

    When I’m with someone, it’s because I genuinely care about them and this just feels mean and cruel. Got to thank my mother for making sure I turned out a gentleman. I think I can handle giving her a bit of drama but not enough to make her heart hurt and only do this if I plan on keeping her around. I refuse to pump and dump because the law of Karma says my actions will create the same for my sister or my future daughter/s.

  41. honest truth May 25, 2013 at 8:26 pm - Reply

    I can’t tell if you really believe women “know” it’s a game or you just want to believe that they know. You need to stop this. It’s messed up that you think that lying to women is a legit way to form relationships. You’re not high value. That’s scum value. Seriously. How would you like guys doing this to your mother, sister, wife, or daughter?

  42. The Pickup Artist June 20, 2013 at 8:50 am - Reply

    A very nice post and video Julien. Your concepts on game is on another level. Tyler is my idol in pickup, but you’re on a different level, so it’s funny that I hear some people say you’re a copy of TD; which totally isn’t tru as far as style goes.

  43. Socialkenny June 20, 2013 at 9:00 am - Reply

    Looking forward to a Julien post on LTR management. We need a little of that too to strike a balance.

  44. Eric Coelho July 30, 2013 at 6:19 am - Reply

    OMG this article has everything! Thank u!

  45. Rosida Macualy August 6, 2013 at 8:12 am - Reply

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  46. BJ Simmonds August 23, 2013 at 10:20 pm - Reply

    You really are something else julien. Asshole lol

  47. Megan September 13, 2013 at 4:21 am - Reply

    That is some intense reverse psychology-little player bullshit. Thank you for convincing my idiotic, easily brainwashed ex boyfriend that he was justified in cheating on me. Can’t even say he’s all to blame because girls (including myself) are equally as stupid to take men like you (and him!) back. Well, never again. In a way I guess I have to thank you because you taught me something, too. I can now spot guys like you from a mile away and trust me you will never have a chance with a true “dime”. (Inside & out, I mean. SOME GIRLS OUT THERE ARE WORTH MORE THAN THIS! Intelligent gorgeous faithful women!!!!! ) Not all girls cherish this dramatic/ manipulative psycho-babble bullshit! know there are men out there who are REAL MEN & not little boys who need to study & write/ preach tirades on how to get away with hurting people.

    You’re the lowest of the low & I feel sorry for the poor woman who ends up with youin the long run. (WITH *ANY* OF YOU, actually!)

    I hope one day you may have a daughter & her significant other can use your teachings to play her emotions & take advantage of her physically/psychologically! Until then enjoy being empty & unfulfilled playing games. WHY DON’T YOU SHARE THAT JULIEN WITH YOUR LEGION OF DRONES, huh? You and I both know who you really are. It is sad, actually. I feel sorry for you… :-(

    But not that sorry.

    You make me physically sick.

    Good luck. You will need it.


  48. Megan September 13, 2013 at 4:28 am - Reply

    You are not even worth correcting the typos in my above post lol have fun wasting yalls time with games while us real adults have actual satisfying encounters with REAL people… no complicated game plans needed! Wake up!!!! I know I have wasted about enough time even ranting this! You’re sooooo not worth another second

  49. Nick December 24, 2013 at 4:32 pm - Reply

    Hey Megan your the exact kinda know it all girl that guys like us target. With that mentality i hope you continue to keep getting your heart broken.

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